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Funky & Funny Best Man Speech July 22, 2006

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The best man gives a funky speech with a bit of music and humor to liven up the wedding reception.

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Tradition would dictate that this toast would impart be an opportunity to bring out embarrassing moments in Kenny's past for all his friends and family. But I gotta tell you, I'm above that. I'm not gonna talk about the time Kenny impersonated a Dallas cowboy football player in a bar. Just so happens that Emmet and Michael Irvin were there so it seemed believable. Just to impress the ladies. That would be out of line for me to mention that moment. And it would be even worse to talk about the times he broke furniture with his rear end parties because he had too much to drink. That would be completely - that would be completely - and utterly unfair for me to talk about those moments tonight because tonight is about Summer and Kenny. Not just Kenny and his idiocy and his past.

But, I gotta tell you the first moment that I knew - I told this story the other night but I didn't have a band behind me so I think it's gonna be better. The first moment that I knew that Kenny and Summer, that Kenny had found somebody that he's in love with and might very well spend the rest of his life with, was one of the first time I called him in Houston and I got into his answering machine and his answering message was, "Hello, this is Summer and Kenny's, please leave a message and we'll return you call as soon as possible. Beep." I said, "Wow, that's in stark contrast to the messages that I used to get pre-Summer on Kenny's answering machine -

Gimme a beat. "Yeah. You've been to Kenny's house, I ain't here right now but if you're lucky, I might call you back. So that's what I'm talking about. If look real real good, leave me your name, and leave me your number and I'll call you back when I get around to it, girl. Beep." (laughter and applause)

But seriously, oh it's too late for seriousness. Kenny and I haven't had a whole lot of seriousness but seriously, I'm so proud of you guys. Kenny is one of the best friends in the world. He's so loyal, he's so loving and he's a super individual and I know he's gonna be an even more incredible husband to Summer who deserves it. She's a wonderful person, I've gotten to know her over the last five years or so. And I'm just happy for the both of you. All the happiness in the world.

Summer and Kenny, I love you guys both.

Courtesy of bmurphyaustintx

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